I want to share many things with you, I don't know what to say to apologize, i wanted to be by your side to write for you and to console you, but ... 2020 didn't give me this chance. i have lost my inspiration, i couldn't write anything i was completely lost, i wanted to challenge myself so i started a new job, i tried something new but unfortunately it was a toxic experience, in a toxic place with toxic people. once again, i trusted and i got hurt, i gave my all but i received NADA!
still, 2020 gave birth to my first album, my biggest pride, whenever i think about it i smile, it warms up my cold heart, once again thanks for your endless support even when i wasn't active you were sending me your sweet MSGs , your love is so pure and innocent, it fed my lonely nights. i miss my audience i miss my readers i miss my poetry world. i miss myself..
this year i'm coming back but not solo lol, me and my BEBE PANDA :D i can't sleep without hugging and kissing him :D
if you wonder why PANDA? mmmm simply 'cause it reminds me of someone i used to call "best friend", an angel who came into my broken world to evacuate my dead heart, but... unfortunately friendship in this world doesn't exist. i don't know how to explain it. but it hurts when you think about the beautiful moments you shared with someone special, having this pure and spiritual connection, strong emotions, innocent love between two humans, doesn't need description, boundaries or engagement, you can be whoever you want with that person, you can be YOU, i couldn't believe that i finally met someone who is ME but male version lol, imagine being with someone who can read your thoughts without saying a word, someone you can hug when you are lonely someone who can fill the void in your heart, who won't give you this desire of being in a relationship, who can be your lover, friend, family, soulmate who can be YOU.
but ... suddenly without words, without reasons, without problems, without misunderstandings you wake up alone, your shoulders are cold no one is hugging you, and your heart is lonely again... this is my biggest deception...it's what i can't forget because i can't even write the last chapter of this story..
am i able to forget? am i able to trust again? am i able to stop blaming myself without even doing somthing wrong? can i get the chance to say the final goodbye?
This story was very inspiring, and it teased my pen...and... it's coming...
TO BE CONTINUED...
-PYG's Whisper
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